Sunday, 7 July 2013

The Chaucer Pubbe Gagge

'Three fellowes wenten into a pubbe, 
And gleefullye their handes did rubbe, 
In expectatione of revelrie, 
For 'twas the houre known as happye. Greate botelles of wine did they quaffe, 
And hadde a reallye good laffe. 
'Til drunkennesse held full dominione, 
For 'twas two for the price of one. 

Yet after wine and meade and sac, 
Man must have a massive snack, 
Great pasties from Cornwalle! 
Scottishe eggs round like a balle! 
Great hammes, quaile, ducke and geese! They suck'd the bones and drank the grease! 

(One fellowe stood all pale and wan, 
For he was vegetarianne) 
Yet man knoweth that gluttonie, 
Stoketh the fyre of lecherie, 
Upon three young wenches round and slye, 
The fellowes cast a wanton eye.

One did approach, with drunkene winke: 
"'Ello darlin', you fancy a drink?", 
Soon they caught them on their knee, 
'Twas like some grotesque puppettrie! 
Such was the lewdness and debaucherie - 
'Twas like a sketch by Dick Emery! 
(Except that Dick Emery is not yet borne - 
So such comparisonne may not be drawn). 

But then the fellowes began to pale, 
For quail are not the friende of ale! 
And in their bellyes much confusione! 
From their throats vile extrusione! 
Stinking foule corruptionne! 
Came spewinge forth from droolinge lippes, 
The fetide stenche did fille the pubbe, 
'Twas the very arse of Beelzebubbe! 
Thrown they were, from the Horne And Trumpette, 
In the street, no coyne, no strumpet. 

Homeward bounde, must quicklie go, 
To that ende - a donkey stole! 
Their handes all with vomit greased, 
The donkey was not pleased, 
 And threw them into a ditche of shite! 
They all agreed: "What a brillant night!"'

Well now for something completely different! lol This is by the amazing comedian Bill Bailey, who is easily my all time favourite. He is a highly intellectual comedian, with a very skewed view on life and is an absolutely fantastic musician - here is the link to watch him perform 'The Chaucer Pubbe Gagge' on Youtube.

I wanted to post something totally different today (but not so different that it's not connected to writing) so here it is! - and after all 'The Canterbury Tales' is just one long poem. I've read the 'Canterbury Tales' (a translated version) and just loved it! It also has that added appeal that Geoffrey Chaucer died before completing it so you never see them reach Canterbury, and so never know how it all ends - don't we all love a mystery.

In other news I'm excited to say that my poem 'A Sleepless Summer' will be featured on Morgen Bailey's Writing Blog ~ Post-Weekend Poetry tomorrow, 8th July at 7pm (UK time) - I will post it on twitter when it's live. Also later in the summer two of my flash fiction pieces will be featured on her 'Flash Fiction Fridays', things are looking positive :)

Hope you are having a lovely weekend enjoying the sunshine.

Monday, 1 July 2013

New Poem of the Month for July ~ Symbols and Meanings

It was raining in my dreams
holding the air in a metallic embrace
                                                        ... and you 
with a shy quicksilver smile
holding out pink roses
                              ... and golden pocket watches

Asking what meanings are held here
was another day's question
for another night's dreaming...

You held my paling hands,
                 ... wrote a message on my palm
and made me promise
not to read it
                    ...till I woke up.

The first of July already - half the year has gone by, sometimes without my noticing! 

I know, I know another poem about dreaming! lol What can I say, it's a constant inspiration to me. I have set out Symbols and Meanings in a way that it is read like recalling a dream - using the long pauses as a moment of remembering. I hope you enjoy it.

I have entered my flash fiction piece Blackbird into 'The Twisted Tales' competition over at Ether Books, this is in collaboration with Raging Aardvark Publications. The Ether books side of the competition is 'The Peoples Choice Award' for the most downloaded entry - so if you have an iphone or Android please give Blackbird a chance and download it here, it's completely free :)

Also I came across this website - Gareth Prior ~ Poet and Compulsive Reader on Facebook. He urges his readers to take a chance on some poetry for their summer holiday reading and I couldn't agree more! So I have to get promotion in here don't I!? Silver Threads is free to download from Google Drive (button at the top of the blog) and I think it would be a great place to start your summer of poetry! :)

Coming up soon is the next Guest Post installment. I'm really excited and could almost clap my hands in glee, she is writing it right now.

Happy Monday